Facing Criticism - Who am I?
Posted on April 28, 2007
Filed Under Personal |
Criticism always seems to be unfair. Even constructive criticism my have a barb to it and even though it may be intended for my good there may be a prick as the point is made.
Because I have often held positions of leadership over the past 15 years I have often been the target of criticism. I have seen people want to inflict damage and hurt upon others and myself because of their perception about what I should or shouldn’t have done or what I did or didn’t do.
My conclusion - I will never make everyone happy all of the time. And I will make most people unhappy some of the time.
It is very important for me to know who I am if I want successfully lead, take the initiative and be a positive influence on my world. For some reason there will be people who will want to criticize even my noblest efforts. Why, I really don’t know. I can’t understand such a mentality that seeks to destroy and tear down. But they will are a part of my reality. Therefore to face this I need to have a solid sense of my own reality.
I need to know who I am. Or in the words of someone else, “know thyself.” Otherwise I will wrongly draw my self concept from the criticism that I face.
- If I know myself I do not immediately need to defend myself against everything that is said against me.
- If I know myself I can learn to laugh easily at the sillier aspects of the criticism that I face
- If I know myself i don’t have to try to change to suit everyone else’s perception of what I should be.
Who am I? I am Chris. I am over 40. Going a bit gray. Father of 4 kids. Husband to April. A bit intense in personality. I have some obsessive traits but I try to control them. A bit useless practically. But someone who cares deeply, tries to be a good friend to others and tries to make a positive contribution to other’s lives.
Thats me. Welcome.
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6 Responses to “Facing Criticism - Who am I?”
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The usual sarcasm aside, I am joined by many others in knowing that you are ever so much more than that. Returning to this town has cemented my view of you are are, since the void that remains since you and your family departed this town is palpable and hollow.
thanks bryan
There’s a delicate balance in accepting criticism. Constructive criticism can be a real positive; “Whoever stubbornly refuses to accept criticism will suddenly be broken beyond repair.”, and false flattery helps no-one.
The catch though is it’s always personal, so detaching yourself from that is a challenge, especially if you’ve just put your heart and soul into something, only to be criticised for it.
The other issue is that everyone has an opinion (just listen to me now). Distilling the pearls of wisdom from the dross is a challenge, and requires wisdom in itself, not to mention humlity.
So maybe the answer is to know your course, and stay the course, but like a sailor, be prepared to tack to make best use of the environment you’re in.
Maybe I’ve just said, know yourself
Oh, and I agree with Bryan.
very true Dave. thanks for adding this perspective.
As well as knowing yourself, I guess it Is important to be aware of the impact you have on other people.
n my view, that’s the most important element of constructive criticism, or any kind of feedback.
This post was more about how you receive criticism rather than giving it. The comment about knowing yourself was to be able to take on board negative and positive feedback but to still be able to get on with life.