I thought my end was very close,
Frantically looking for somewhere to go,
Every path seemed like a dead end,
It was then I called out to God,
I asked, “What do you think you are doing?”

Opposition seemed to be my daily message,
Speaking words to bring me me down,
Wanting to crush my spirit completely,
I heard them and thought they were true,
They echoed in my head, day and night,
I began repeating the defeat words,
Thinking that they were my destiny.

God knew what he was doing in my life,
Creating a path of hope for me,
Gradually life emerged again,
My daily task to first seek God,
Bringing fresh light to the path.

People, frenemies quickly turned,
Seeking the worst for me,
Pretending to care with veiled threats,
But, my daily search for truth,
Disarmed the stream of false truths,
Their message bouncing of my daily praise.

The lies told me death was hope,
But my life is now a witness to God’s promise,
The lies are completely defeated,
A constant thorn to destruction’s wish,
Betrayal has become his daily burden,
Duplicity hounding him to sleepless nights,
A weight that gets heavier each day.

I look with confidence to each new day,
Rejection transformed by acceptance,
My life is a celebration of God’s faithfulness,
To the one who lost his way but is found,
Victory is not found in vindication,
But, in living with eternal trust,
I am completed by praising God today.

Greed’s face is a terrifying sight,
To those who hunger for life’s trinkets,
They live with a gaping hole,
Never satisfied and constantly lusting,
They live with the emptiness of being alone,
Desire a torturous hunger never satiated,
Having more and more but never knowing why?

I know the deep hunger that is this life’s curse,
But, I found the blessing that is God’s gift,
It came to me in my darkest hour,
What I forgot God reminded me,
My memory slowly restored,
Understanding giving freedom,
Words that sought belonging,
Received with Grace.

Blessing is now fully received,
Day after day my life connected to holiness,
Grace and flesh completely belonging to each other,
Everything given to Grace in loving acceptance,
My voice shouting daily praise.

Forgiveness is my constant request Lord,
In a brief moment I chose death words,
That sought to see the worst,
In an instant anger took over,
Leaving deep hurt in its wake.

In the midst of this I cried for forgiveness,
I look to God for healing,
Seeking kindness to replace the anger,
Turning sadness into tears of laughter,
Lies are the hurtful twisting of truth,
That are spat out by venom’s tongue,
Seeking to separate my Spirit from God’s,
Looking for an opportunity for Death’s victory.

Today I will look for life’s words,
Seeking to restore the hope that begun,
Not allowing death to wreak destruction,
Looking to belong again after destroyed trust,
I will seek the goodness that belongs to me,
The rest that comes from loving deeply,
Giving daily thanksgiving to God,
For his abundant life giving words,
That are my hope for restoration.

God’s timing is impeccable,
He always turns up,
Even in the midst of disaster,
That time is his,
All our time belongs to God.

The pride of arrogance believes he is control
He runs around shouting about his greatness,
Sucking in the weak who want cheap hope,
Defiantly shaking his fist at God,
Seeking to make his mark on the world,
With his self attributed greatness.

God will not tolerate this foolishness forever,
The day is coming when reality will be faced,
God will mirror all his arrogant hatred,
He will see all what he has done,
Reality will be his daily terror,
Truth a nightmare when sleeping.

My time is spent finding new ways to praise God,
This is my first job every day,
Remembering him each day is my delight,
Waking with joyous thoughts of hope,
Experiencing God’s daily unfolding of truth,
These are my greatest pleasures.

My dear enemy’s time’s nearly up,
His sleeplessness nights,
Are a sign of what’s coming,
The stench of hatred’s words,
Will be smelt by everyone,
No perfume can hide its putrid odour,
It’s the smell of fear,
That is seen in God’s coming victory.

There is only one sure thing in life,
This is God’s love to those who trust him,
Power hungry liars will die like everyone else,
The greedy life destroyer’s time is running out,
God’s final work will set it all right,
His word will still the hater’s tongue for ever,
His word will bring life to the broken hearted.

In the midst of the great silence,
God is watching every evil act,
Nothing is missed,
I will wait for him,
Certain that my voice is heard,
And, that God’s love will protect me.

Evil men’s intentions are running rampant,
They are a stampede of hate,
Crowding together destroying all in their path,
They have one thought,
Crush everything that interferes with their desire,
They don’t ever consider God’s desires,
They are consumed by their lust for power,
The carnage of their mindless selfishness,
Witnessed in the daily woundings of your faithful people.

God will soon unleash justice,
There is no escape from his eternal plan,
Selfish desire will bow to eternal justice,
The stupidity of selfishness will not be able to hide,
There will be no escape plan possible for arrogance.

This world belongs to God,
The stampede’s power will be halted by his Voice,
When he says, “Enough”,
The mindless selfishness will know its stupidity,
Its power will disintegrate into nothing,
God will remember the wounds caused by selfishness,
He will comfort the brokenhearted,
Justice will be their soothing balm.

A heart that loves only God,
Becomes the most beautiful instrument,
That only plays love songs,
Its melody starts deep in my stomach,
And becomes a voice that sings continuously,
It sings out daily God praise.

I know the blues,
The pain of betrayal,
For a while it was my lament,
I thought it came from my failure,
From this pain I heard the most beautiful voice,
That became my healing source.

Enemies come and go,
The seek only their own good,
They miss the joy of true love,
The understanding of a personal love song,
Sung by their creator,
Instead they create a cacophony of sound,
Seeking to drown out their own hate,
Choosing anything but love.

Today I stopped to listen,
I needed to pause,
The deafening hate noise was too much,
When I stopped,
I could hear my Lord’s song again,
Tonight I will sleep with his love song lullaby,
The restful sleep of a much loved child.

I wonder why God allows injustice to reign?
Why can’t he sort things now?
I impatiently listen to the gloat of my dear enemy,
Day after day God’s justice delayed,
I ask myself, “am I wrong?”
Prosperity continues to aid his evil intent,
While I continue to hear hatred’s voice.

Ignorance has it’s own reward,
Its hatred will return to haunt my enemy,
Life’s source will return everyone to truth,
We all will face God’s deepest love,
The brokenhearted, betrayed and battle weary,
Will find fresh life flowing eternally.

My dear enemy will meet Justice,
Destiny has no escape route,
When pride meets perfect love,
Death is the eternal outcome,
My broken heart yearns for Justice,
I wait for God’s belonging to be fulfilled,
Trusting in God’s guiding hand.

My life is a witness to eternal love’s voice speaking to me,
Everywhere I look God has the final word,
My world is a list of tumultuous daily calamities ,
Opposition is all around seeking to drag me into its deathly web,
This doesn’t worry God in the slightest,
At any moment his Word will bring it to order.

When everything was wrong,
My God set out to make it all right,
The ultimate defeat transformed into victory,
The inheritance of the much loved child,
Now is my daily treasured hope.

This life is not here for long,
But, Eternity’s voice is waiting to be heard,
I need to learn to listen better,
Lest I forget the important words,
Given to me from God’s deepest pain,
Word’s that hear forgiveness’ restoration,
Gifts of belonging that are deaf to hate.

Out of despair’s hopelessness,
I have returned to the pain shared by God,
We visited its deepest betrayals,
Heard all the destructive words spewed out by contempt,
All the hate vomit bringing me closer to love’s sweet sounds.

My hardest lessons were to find peace,
My obvious shortcomings became a mountain of despair,
The pit of loneliness allowed no light,
By myself I could not find my way,
I felt Love’s firm hand on my shoulder,
Pointing me towards belonging again.

When love and faithfulness collided with my life,
The sparks shot to the heavens,
The light shower showed me the way forward,
The paralysis of despair healed completely,
My life bursting with creativity,
Certainty in God’s unfailing love,
Poverty is not an option,
In the midst of God’s abundant grace,
Daily forgiveness showing the next step forward.

Harvest time is coming soon,
My spirit revived by meeting life’s deepest joy,
Acceptance replaces rejection,
Belonging bringing a deep gladness,
My life speaking of daily eternal hope.

My heart bears the wounds of violence,
I witness daily random acts of cruelty,
Plans made from pride,
Crush those who seek humility,
Targeting those who love God’s voice,
I wonder how much longer it will be allowed,
Justice is a growing in it’s thunderous anger.

The evil intentions cloaked in sweet words,
Are obvious when God voice is whispering to me daily,
Greed will be exposed as poverty,
Possessions torn from evil’s grasp,
Left with nothing but their pitiful pride.

Shame will be violence’s only lasting memory,
Pursued by God’s rage against their cruel acts,
They will be left with nothing,
Destined to everlasting poverty,
Terror will be their last glance at this life,
When God turns up he demands attention.

There is still time for everyone to listen,
God reminds us daily of his presence,
Peace is an opportunity waiting to be grasped,
God will not forget those who have learned to listen,
Forgiveness is the balm for all wounds,
Open hearts that are broken open to pour out love,
This is the healing that God brings to our wounds.

Out of my deep sorrows came the terrible silence,
Everywhere I searched for life I came up empty,
Despising my weakness I wanted nothing to do with life,
I wallowed in a cesspool of numbness,
Thinking constant thoughts of woe is me.

I thought I was lost forever,
When darkness has no ray of light at the end,
My God path lost forever in a maze of false possibilities,
In my every waking moment fear clutched my stomach,
Waking to the retch of the lies that thundered in my head.

I cried out to my God in the early morning,
All day I wondered if He would turn up,
I hoped for love’s great reversal,
To speak life into near death,
My hope that today life will speak again,
Light is most needed when darkness is everywhere,
Salvation’s hope is coming closer each day.

My heart longs for that place called home,
Where my soul and flesh are in harmony,
That place where rest is the final breath each day.

I long for that sense of belonging fully,
Where all the uncertainty is completed,
Home is where all my questions are answered,
Asking welcomed by a heart that loves.

In the meantime I see the promise,
And, home dwells within me,
My birthmark showing where I belong,
My voice speaking words owned by eternity,
Home is returning to my life’s source,
To know completely from where I was born.

Children’s religious program

“Almighty . . .
Forgive
My doubt,
My anger
My pride.
By Thy mercy
Abase me,
By Thy strictness
Raise me up.”

“Have mercy
Upon us.
Have mercy
Upon our efforts,
That we
Before Thee,
In love and in faith,
Righteousness und humility,
May follow Thee,
With self-denial, steadfastness, and courage,
And meet Thee
In the silence.

Give us
A pure heart
That we may see Thee,
A humble heart
That we may hear Thee,
A heart of love
That we may serve Thee,
A heart of faith
That we may live Thee.

Thou
Whom I do not know
But Whose I am.

Thou
Whom I do not comprehend
But Who hast dedicated me
To my fate.
Thou –“

Failure is not something that I want to know,
It suggests that I am less than I think I am.

I want to bask in my success
Instead,
Failure’s a part of my story,
I know failure is part of everyone’s journey.
I didn’t think it would be a part of mine.

But, here I am.
Living with failure,

Failure is a word that I hear again and again,
That word clatters around my head,
Noisily,
Constantly,
Painfully.

Will it ever stop!

A constant gaze inward,
Makes it very hard to see,
That my Heavenly Father,
Plans the best for me.

Prides constant pull,
Seeks to draw attention to me,
I forget my Fathers gaze,
And his love I fail to see.

Lightness is calling loudly,
It longs to set me free,
If only I open my eyes,
Becoming all he wants me to be.

“I am dead because I lack desire;
I lack desire because I think I possess;
I think I possess because I do not try to give.
In trying to give, you see that you have nothing;
Seeing you have nothing, you try to give of yourself;
Trying to give of yourself, you see that you are
nothing;
Seeing you are nothing, you desire to become;
In desiring to become, you begin to live.”