Be yourself - Everyone else is taken (Oscar Wilde)
I Thought
I thought that I was strong,
I thought that anything was possible,
All I needed to do,
Was to believe enough in myself,
And, it could be done.
I thought that I was in control,
I thought that I determined my future,
All I needed to do,
Was to have enough things,
And, my world was secure.
I was wrong.
I awake suddenly with a start. It is dark as death. Dark, and terribly late at night. The sky is filled with barely visible clouds whipping across the void.
I am standing on a hillside, almost a cliff, a sheer tumbling down, plummeting down to the pitch black water. I sense rather than see the saltbush and stunted shrubs that cling for dear life against the sea, churning so far below.
The air is full of the roar of the waves, grinding and casting and moaning against the rocks far beneath, bellowing and sighing, as though great Behemoth were gnawing away at the precarious handhold life has here, trying to drag it, spinning and circling, into its foaming maw.
I can smell the salt fresh of the air, the tang of it, sea spray ice-cold across my face.
Across the black sea, made velvet by height, shines the moon, huge by the horizon. It is as though she has drawn close for some oblique, esoteric reason of her own, casting her light like a highway.
There is hope, then, but mediated. If the sun were risen, how different it would be. I wrap my arms around my body, holding in my life-heat. It is still deep night, as though the sun were dead, leaving only an unreliable memory, were it not for the moon, relaying his light – reflected, lessened. A token, a remembrance, of hope then, rather than the hope itself. Just enough to see the next step by; not enough to warm me.
I have to move, to walk. I can barely see the faintest of paths, rocky, muddy, treacherous. If I slip, if I miss my footing, then I will join the rocks and be consumed by the all-devouring mouth of the sea.
But move I must. To stay here is death as well, ossifying in the despairing cold. Though I can barely see, there is just enough light to walk the next step of the path, hesitantly and with painful delicacy, gripping onto plants, as they loom out of the night, revealing their branches against the dim sky.
As I walk, following the dim path carefully, painstakingly, along the cliff edge, I have a subtle sense that, though I can see no-one through the black, and hear no-one past the inexorable crash and roar of the sea, I am not alone. Someone has walked this path before. And the faintest echo of laughter, the scent of the best wine kept for last, a fragment of sun-warmed dust seems to brush against my skin. The faintest of hopes, when hope seems lost.
I walk.
Alister Pate (Pate 2011, 10)
A constant gaze inward,
Makes it very hard to see,
That my Heavenly Father,
Plans the best for me.
Prides constant pull,
Seeks to draw attention to me,
I forget my Fathers gaze,
And his love I fail to see.
Lightness is calling loudly,
It longs to set me free,
If only I open my eyes,
Becoming all he wants me to be.
What does it take
to mark the canvas
to write the line
to play the chord
to plough the field
to cross the river
to change the world?
Perhaps
the courage
to let become
what is waiting to become.
(‘What does it take?’ in Adams 2010)
My son Toby plays Rugby Union. He loves his footy. He is fanatical about his sport and Rugby at the moment is the top of his list. He sleeps with his rugby ball. He lives for Friday night training and the Saturday game.
In his competition Toby is always the smallest guy on the field. I estimate that some of the players in the other teams would be almost double his weight and half his height again. Toby’s position is hooker. This means that he is always in the midst of the action.
Every week I watch him get punished by the opposition. He is small enough for most of the other guys to easily knock him down. Every time he gets the ball and doesn’t manage to offload he gets flattened. But, he never stops getting into the rucks, tackling, looking for the ball and loving the game.
The other week his team played a particularly competitive team. Their coach had obviously done a lot of work with them and they were big, fast and aggressive (a lot like their coach actually).
I watched as Toby got jersey slung to the ground by one of the opposition and then jumped on by another player. As he tried to get up the player started punching him.
Toby barely gave him a second glance as the other guy swung into mid air. Toby was already on his way running back the game. The opposition player was letting his team down because he had lost his focus on the main game.
In the end I am not sure who won or lost this game. I do know that our guys played with their hearts. I, like every other proud Dad that day felt my heart swell as I watched my boy play to his full potential against a bigger, faster and stronger team.
Three important lessons I have learned about teamwork after watching from my son’s footy games:
1. Keep your eye on the ball – In the words of Steven Covey, “The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing”. When the other guy wanted to throw a punch Toby was already running to the next ruck. He was focussed on the game and wasn’t going to be distracted from the main thing.
2. What the ref says goes even though he may not be always right.
We all need to get used a few bad calls in life. The ref is human and can only view the game through his perspective. I have seen games of footy where parents have actually gone onto to the playing field to abuse the ref for a bad call. I wonder to myself what sort of lessons the players learning from the adults’ behaviour.
Any learning requires some adjustment of our prior understandings. Learn to ask the question and then get on with the task at hand.
We appreciate the feedback that we get in our Certificate IV in Training and Assessment. We are constantly looking at ways to improve. And, sometimes we get it wrong. This is true for anyone who wants to learn. We can try to justify ourselves to the person who is making the call or we can get on and learn the lesson.
3. My feedback on the game is very important to my son.
One of the most important parts of Toby’s footy game is at the end when he asks me how he went. My feedback matters to Toby. He needs me to watch him and give him advice.
This I think is the most important lesson I have learned. That going to the footy every week is one of my most valuable inputs I have into my son’s life. When he asks me, “did I run forward this week, Dad”? My affirmation is vital for Toby. He needs to know that he has done exactly what I asked and I love watching his face light up when he is told he did well.
Learning is about growth. We only understand ourselves when we others take the time to give us feedback.
You can probably tell that I am quite a proud Dad. I love the way that my son is developing and I feel a great responsibility in ensuring that he is equipped to grow into a responsible adult. I am continually learning about how to become a better parent and am looking for ways that I can grow my understanding of my children.
Rudyard Kipling says it so well in his poem, “If”,
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
‘ Or walk with Kings – nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And – which is more – you’ll be a Man, my son!
Failure is not something that I want to know,
It suggests that I am less than I think I am.
I want to bask in my success
Instead,
Failure’s a part of my story,
I know failure is part of everyone’s journey.
I didn’t think it would be a part of mine.
But, here I am.
Living with failure,
Failure is a word that I hear again and again,
That word clatters around my head,
Noisily,
Constantly,
Painfully.
Will it ever stop!
Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12
9 Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
10 If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
and has no one to help them up.
11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
12 Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
During the time we lived in China we experienced many things that have amazed, saddened and touched our lives.
One day I was walking home from the supermarket and I heard this amazing sound reverberating through the streets in my area. I am one of those guys who isn’t musical at all but I know what I like. And, I think that this guy was good, very good. A lot of other people thought so too because people began coming out of shops and crowding around the footpath to hear where this amazingly beautiful sound was coming from.
From, among all the people emerged its source. It was a guy pushing in front of him a trolley with a portable PA system and on top of that he had a donation box. The first thing I noticed about his person was that he was dressed very poorly. Xian is quite cold and he only had on a fairly thin coat that was quite dirty. The next thing I noticed was that he had a white cane draped over his arm. He was also blind. It appeared the way he survived was to literally sing for his supper.
I had to go into a shop to get a couple of things and by the time that I came out he was very close. But, he had stopped. He was still singing but he couldn’t go any further forward because the edge of his trolley was caught on the edge of the wheel of a pushbike.
Although it was obvious to everyone else he couldn’t see what he was trying to push past. He was just stuck in the same place, singing beautifully but unable to move forward.
I watched for a short period of time and saw that no one was going to help him. I decided that I was going to sort this out and moved the bike wheel out of his way. Straight away he was able to start moving forward again. As he went past he thanked me (xie xie).
The beauty of a good partnership is that sometimes you are there to clear the way for each other. What can seem like an insurmountable problem for one may be solved very simply by the other. Together you create something of far greater value than what could be done alone.
“People are like stained glass windows: They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light within.”
Our family are Aldi fans. We love the specials that come out each week. This is because the Gribbles love a bargain. However a special is not special unless you need the item that is being sold.
For some specials at our local Aldi people will line up well before opening time to ensure that they don’t miss out on a bargain. We usually miss out because we couldn’t be bothered to be that early.
Some specials don’t always hit the mark. Recently our Aldi had a sale of snow gear. Things like helmets, ski gloves, ski pants and so on.
When we arrived there was still a few of the clothing items and a huge pile of snow sleds. I looked at the snow sled and couldn’t see much use for it to begin with. An important point to remember is that it doesn’t snow in our area.
I had an idea. I thought about the slopes around our backyard. We might not have snow but we do have nice grassy hills.
I bought two of the sleds. They were only $15 each. My wife said I was crazy.
The result? Hours and hours of fun. You can check it out by clicking on this link.
I find it sad that we live in a world where right and wrong is determined by whether we are happy. By doing this a person is making the ultimate selfish comment. “I am happy when things work out my way” The insinuation is that I must be right if I feel happy. I am unhappy when things are not working out my way. Something must be wrong if this is occurring. I will either blame other people or God for this problem. Either response reflects the immaturity of childishness by demonstrating determining our place in the world on the basis of how the world is responding to me. Personal desire is the benchmark for right and wrong.
It has struck me recently that when dealing with conflict in my workplace that some people have never progressed simple childish responses. And ultimately if the decisions that I make don’t make them happy then I am wrong.
I hope that my children are able to grow beyond this. I don’t want to raise emotional infants. I hope that my children are able to see the world through other people’s eyes as well as their own. So that they don’t live in the illusion that simply because they are happy that everything else is alright.
“Almighty . . .
Forgive
My doubt,
My anger
My pride.
By Thy mercy
Abase me,
By Thy strictness
Raise me up.”
“Have mercy
Upon us.
Have mercy
Upon our efforts,
That we
Before Thee,
In love and in faith,
Righteousness und humility,
May follow Thee,
With self-denial, steadfastness, and courage,
And meet Thee
In the silence.
Give us
A pure heart
That we may see Thee,
A humble heart
That we may hear Thee,
A heart of love
That we may serve Thee,
A heart of faith
That we may live Thee.
Thou
Whom I do not know
But Whose I am.
Thou
Whom I do not comprehend
But Who hast dedicated me
To my fate.
Thou –“
This is from the Online School post on a 100 things to read about the future of online learning:
Full post is here
Online Learning
Find out what direction the relatively new field of online learning might be taking with these articles.
- The future of e-learning is social learning. Take a look at what social learning is and why it is the future of online learning.
- The U.S. Department of Education releases a report on online learning studies. Find out what the US Department of Education says about the powerful impact of online learning.
- Telepresence: The future of synchronous learning?. Combining audio and video technology to simulate a face-to-face meeting may be the future of distance learning.
- The Future of OCW, and “OCW 2.0”. This post speculates that open courseware will become a source of college credit in the next few years.
- What’s behind the Explosive Growth in Distance Learning?. Learn why distance learning is growing so quickly as well as some predictions for the future of distance learning.
- Online courses helping people be tech savvy seniors. The over-55 crowd has begun to embrace technology and are now headed back to school via the Internet.
- Online Mentoring Programs. Get examples of how and why online mentoring works and discover why this may be a wave of the future.
- How-To: Engage the Managers of Distance Learning. While this article is specifically directed at management training in the workplace, it is an excellent example of how distance learning instructors may be conducting their classes in the future.
- Top 60 Jobs That Will Rock the Future. Check out number 41–Distance Education Consultant. According to this post, “the future of college is online.”
The more I hear of Sir Ken the more I like what he has to say. Much of what is said here is based on his latest book, “A New View of Human Capacity”.
Vygotsky, has brought many new insights to the world of education that can be applied to one’s spiritual growth. The foundational premise of Vygotsky’s concept of development is that the formation of the mind or cognition is dependent on the social context in which an individual lives.
Vygotsky’s sociocultural approach to developmentalism.
The following insights can be gleaned from his writings and it is posited that a integrated application of his developmental principles form a solid foundation for one’s spiritual growth, sustainable ministry and continued attendance to the things of God.
Spiritual growth begins outside the individual. Spiritual growth is not simply an internal process, but is partially an acquisition from the community of faith in which the individual engages. While spirituality is often perceived as an individual or personal quality, it also has a social or cooperate dimension. Most ministers would agree that Scripture asserts one’s belonging to God’s community, the church but its application to one’s personal spiritual growth is uncertain. This dichotomy is expressed by many who preach the need for the church but view the ‘real work’ of spiritual growth taking place privately. Both must be held as true if spiritual growth is to occur within one’s ministry context.
Spiritual growth is holistic. To ensure that one is able to sustain their ministry and guard against burnout requires one to view themselves in a holistic manner. Spiritual growth is not the result of a single factor, but of multiple factors, both individual and social, which coalesce within the individual. Application of a single devotional method or community form does not allow one’s developmental areas to mature. Vygotsky brings a new perspective on the interaction of one’s physical and mental processes that is closer to the Hebrew understanding of knowledge requiring truth to be related to one’s being not merely the presence of rational proofs.
Spiritual growth isnot a linear or unidirectional process. Vygotsky’s use of zones of development, rather than linear stages of advancement, adds a new approach to our understanding of spiritual growth. Instead of viewing maturity as a linear process that has some end goal growth and maturity may be seen as the complete integration of one’s developmental zones. Spiritual growth would require relationships conducive to advancing faith.
Teachers and deliberate instruction are essential for spiritual growth. According to Vygotsky, development does not occur on its own; it requires a socio-historical impetus, which for him was education, specifically schooling or intentional instruction. Intentional and unintentional instruction by the church contributes to the spiritual growth of all its members. This is instruction by a more mature member of the faith community is required for an individual to reach their formative potential. In the Church Vygotsky’s approach requires the church to function as a family, wherein the more mature members are placed in a learning context with younger members of the faith community. This is in contrast to the role assumed in many larger churches were management and organization is the main requirements of the pastor. To remain in ministry for the long term requires the Pastor to listen to elders and be teachable by their experience.
In most of the popular literature today we are told that aggressiveness is wrong and that assertiveness is the way to go. I think that this is because we equate aggressiveness with the negativity of a bullying attitude.
Of course we know that people get angry. We never really get to see this anger because like many other emtions we are told to bury it. And, because it is rarely expressed and we are out of practice we forget how it should be displayed.
Anger is not always bad. It can be very bad if its done in the wrong way. But, anger can be a good thing. It shows that we care and have a vested interest in what is going on around us. That we have desire to contribute to the discussion or the injustice that we perceive is happening.
Anger is mostly bad when it is about ourselves. In many cases anger because of a personal injustice can quickly become resentment and frustration.
Remember the song, “Don’t worry, Be Happy”. A great little tune, catchy punchline but not always true. We do worry, we aren’t aways happy and shouldn’t always expect to be. Of course I would prefer to be happy than to be angry, but, a part of the key to being happy is knowing how to use anger to be motivated to change the things that are causing my unhappiness.
Sometimes I long to sit and reach out to spiritual world. I want to sit and read books and meditate and contemplate life. I want to think about higher things and not deal with the corruption that we face with our physical world. But, I think that I am learning that this will never happen unless I remove myself from all reality. Spirituality must be able to deal with reality and importantly it must be able to deal with our physical reality.
I quick update on this blog. For a number of months I lost my blog completely. Thankfully I had saved all the neccessary backup files and after some trial and error I was able to recover all my posts.
There is still a lot of work to do. You may notice some formatting errors because of the database upgrade. I will work through these gradually to fix that. This may be a long term project unless I find a script that will go through all my posts and correct them.
Having my blog back makes me feel like I have an old friend return. As I look through it I see my life’s journey over the past three years. I realise again that life can be haphazard. Or maybe that’s more a reflection of my own personality. Anyway I hope that this blog might continue to map my key interests at any given moment. Plus it gives me a place to play around with one of my favourite programs, “WordPress“
Not posting any thing over the past few months is symptomatic of a number of things in my life that aren’t right.
So what does this mean for me? My unbalanced life has become even more unbalanced over recent months. Its time to get unbalanced in the right ways.
An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.”
-martin luther king, jr.
Say no more.
Being wealthy is a powerful predictor that people spend less time doing pleasurable things and more time doing compulsory things – Inspired by Nobel Prize-winning behavioral economist Daniel Kahneman
And this article also went on to add that,
Rich people spent much more time commuting and engaging in activities that were required as opposed to optional
A vital question that one must ask if they are wealthy is, how do I deal with its responsibility.
The rest of this article can be found here…..