Chris Gribble

Be yourself - Everyone else is taken (Oscar Wilde)

Five benefits of checking email once a day

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My name is Chris and I am an email addict. I confess that I may relapse at any moment. But, for now I have my email habit under control.

Slowly I have been reducing my dependence until just recently I took control and decided to check my email once each day at 3.00 pm in the afternoon. At that time I deal with everything that needs to be dealt with from what I have received in the past twenty four hours.

The good news is my world hasn’t fallen apart. Even better news is that I am finding some tangible benefits in limiting my access to this important part of our modern communication.

Below is a list of five benefits that I have noticed since getting my email habit under control:

1. I spend more time on focussed activities.

One of the key issues about feeding my addiction was that it needed gratification several times an hour. My life was consumed by clicking from whatever I was doing to seeing what had arrived in my inbox. At one point I was receiving at least 60 emails an hour. The constant alert of a new arrival left me in a state of permanent distraction.

Focus is all about maintaining a sustained effort. This was not possible in my constant state of distraction. The result was that my productivity was at an all time low. Even though I was engaged in activity the whole time rarely was it actually getting the jobs done that needed to get done.

Nowadays I can sit down and write a 2000 word post in one sitting. I don’t find my attention wandering back to the inbox because I know that can wait till 3.00 pm this afternoon. This type of focus is required for some of the larger tasks that I need to attend to.

2. I no longer need instant gratification of opening the next email.

My system went into withdrawal for a period of time. I remember the empty feeling after I first shut off notifications on my mobile phone. This was the complete turning off not just putting things on silent. I think that quite mode’s vibration even more torture because you know something has arrived but you have to wait till you can check without being noticed. The instant gratification is delayed.

I am discovering that I am able to wait and appreciate the reward that comes from consistently applying myself in extended bursts. What is emerging is far more gratifying than the quick injection of dopamine that my body had become used to. According to Psychology.org the desire for instant gratification comes from a desire for dopamine. Researcher Kent Berridge writes,

“These two systems, the “wanting” (dopamine) and the “liking” (opioid) are complementary. The wanting system propels you to action and the liking system makes you feel satisfied and therefore pause your seeking. If your seeking isn’t turned off at least for a little while, then you start to run in an endless loop. The dopamine system is stronger than the opioid system. You tend to seek more than you are satisfied. Evolution again — seeking is more likely to keep you alive than sitting around in a satisfied stupor.”

I was a victim to an endless search for those chemicals that I find most gratifying. I have learned to replace these short term bursts of pleasure with the satisfaction of committing to a task and seeing it to completion.

3. I can take time out without being anxious

Weekends are mine again. I can take time out to refresh and relax. Usually when the time comes to return to work I am able to do this enthusiastically. I think that this is because my creative store is replenished and waiting to do something.

A settled restlessness

A tightening surge rises from within,
Uncertainty, fearfully, remembering,
Breaks the imagined calm,
Too much, too fast, too soon,
Restlessness breaks in on every task.

Serenity is imagined from my soul’s mind,
Hopefully, trusting, relearning,
Reality is almost in sight,
Rest, slow down, wait,
A settling transforms whatever comes today.

I wrote this poem as I was considering my anxious state that drove me to an incessant email checking. Rest is such a welcome friend but it required a more settled approach to my life. I needed to accept whatever came that day and learn again how to prioritise. In my anxiousness everything felt urgent and important. This became overwhelming to the point of damaging my health.

Each day I know how my day will start. I am a morning person so I don’t want to waste my creative energy answering email. Nowadays I dedicate that most productive time to doing my most creative work. Rather than being anxious I tend to look forward to the tasks that lay ahead for me on any day.

4. I sleep better at night

One of the things that I used to dread was going to bed because of the anticipation of a mass of emails to wade through the next morning. Often I would be checking emails till late at night to try to cut down on the number of emails that would await me in the morning.

Going to sleep is now a welcome part of my daily rhythm. I am thankful that I will wake rested to a new day that has new possibilities ahead. The half settled sleep of worry that I used to have when I went to sleep concerned about what message may arrive during the night is becoming a distant memory. If I do wake I no longer check what’s come in on my mobile phone hoping that my wife doesn’t catch me in the act.

5. I am not constantly distracted.

I was constantly distracted by my inflow of emails. A side effect was that I found it very difficult to delete anything in case it may be important sometime in the future. What happened was that with too much information coming to me I had no time to develop a filter to know what was important and what could be discarded. This overload of information left me constantly distracted.

Our obsession with what may be contained in the latest email that we receive is an indulgence that we can’t afford. Our minds are becoming bloated with information. The fear that something important may be missed is rarely realised.

Alain de Botton says that we need to have periods of fasting from all of this is we are ever going to be able to concentrate. My email checking routine allows space from the self imposed expectation of needing to respond instantly to something that more often than not can wait.

Three key strategies that helped me:

  1. I turned off notifications on the mobile phone – That constant ping that tells you something has arrived is not a part of my life. My advice is to not even play with the idea that you can get away with silent so no one knows about your addiction. This is only fooling yourself.
  2. I started by unplugging for a weekend – It’s always good to start with small victories. The weekend is a good starting point to begin disciplining a chronic email habit.
  3. I ruthlessly unsubscribe – Companies are constantly trying to get email addresses so that they can get their email message to you. Sometimes you need to supply your email address but the law is they need to have an unsubscribe function. Use it ruthlessly. They rarely will have information you need in a mass email. If you do need information you can always go back to that company’s website. I used to get close to 100 emails a day. Now I can get less than 20 emails for the whole day. Unsubscribe!

Re-imagining heroism – A post for those who don’t always feel brave

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Definition of Coward

“one who shows disgraceful fear or timidity”

Our family recently climbed a mountain that is close to our home. It’s not Everest but it does require a bit of climbing up some of the rock faces. The level of difficulty would be classed as very easy but it is a reasonable climb with a magnificent view at the end.

My eldest son doesn’t like heights. From some people’s perspective it might seem that his fear is unreasonable and irrational because sometimes it’s quite limiting for him. This last time as we climbed this mountain I watched him carefully at one point as we climbed up one of the rock faces. I could see his fear and uncertainty as he took each cautious step forward.

When we got to the top I could see his visible relief that he had made it. I made sure we had the time for a quiet moment together and I told him how proud I was that he had made it. My observation was that he didn’t allow his fear to stop him from doing what needed to be done. His fear was real and palpable yet he didn’t allow it to stop him from climbing that mountain.

Fear is a part of everyone’s life. Unreasonable fear can create all sorts of anxiety that if left unchecked can leave us paralysed. I love the words from one of Jesus’ sermons that spoke words of comfort for those who are seeking courage and comfort.” How happy are those who know sorrow.” This is the person who has pushed this world to its limits and recognised its disappointments. The paradox of our humanity is expressed in the contrast between happy and sorrow. Normally you wouldn’t expect them to be in the same sentence.

“How happy are those who know what sorrow means for they will be given courage and comfort! “
J B Phillips

Happiness comes when the limitations of our world are owned honestly, and we understand that relationships will fall short of expectations, material benefits can come and go and prestige can be a fleeting experience. When this is realised and we become vulnerable we are prepared to face our real fears, the ones that will take us to our source.

For many people this is the step that they don’t want to take. As David Whyte says in his poem, “Start Close In”, this is the first step, the step that we don’t want to take. I wrote give me the coward to seek to distinguish from the self declared hero to the person that has recognised his fears, and knows that he is the coward. From this recognition comes the capacity to demonstrate courage in the face of adversity.

The passage from Matthew’s gospel that I quoted earlier is alluding to those people who have started close in, they will know their sorrow, but then out of their sorrow those people get the truest idea of what love looks like. In my poem it’s not the hero who really knows love, they are caught up in their heroic deeds and are forgetful of courage’s testing by love.

In, “Give me the coward”, I chose the word coward because it’s that person who knows the unreasonableness of who they are and feel the deep pain of the tragic gap of who we desire to be and what we know we are. That person is the one that has learned the deep sorrow that comes from life and all of its disappointments. They have felt the fear that comes from when their world spins totally out of control. But, this is the persona who will know happiness. Courage emerges from facing their sorrows and responding in love and kindness. The coward has the more opportunity to be a hero than the person trapped in a self declared sense of grandeur.

Give me the coward

The measure of a man is not in his grandest thoughts,
The self deluded picture of a courageous act,
Reality brings all actions together,
Truth explores love’s result
Courage sifted by love,
Nothing left,
Coward.

Give me the coward who can sob about his weakness,
Who knows there are other things to cry about,
He can gaze into the weariness of sadness,
Eyes feeling the glare of judgement,
The delusions of control,
Knowing lies,
Hero.

The best human stories are redemptive stories. They are the one’s where our biggest failures are transformed into a redeeming triumph. These are the heart stories that we yearn for because such stories provide all of us with hope. Give me the coward sought to be such a story. It seeks to explore the nature of true courage and develop a deeper understanding of each person’s possibility for redemption.

Perspective

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Perspective

The mountain is,
The interminable climb,
Tired muscles, painful breaths,
To get to the top.
Or,
It’s the awesome view,
The soul renewing outlook,
That was waiting to be reached.

Most mornings my wife and I go for a walk. We are fortunate enough to live near the edge of the Toowoomba range so we are given a beautiful context in which to do this. I wrote this poem after seeing a particularly glorious sunrise during this walk.

While we walk we talk. Mostly we talk about people – Our kids, our wider family and our friends are the usual topics. Each day the conversation starts again. Most of the time our talk is a celebration of the good things in our life. Sometimes disappointments come up but they usually don’t take too much of our time.

We try to take a long walk. The minimum time we like is an hour. The gift of this amount of time is that we tend to run out of words. This isn’t the silence because of conflict but the sound of two people being content just to be with each other.

What I find is the walk gives me perspective on the day ahead. Work is about people, relationships, hopes and ideas. It’s also about the things that have to be done. Sometimes work can be the climb, the tiredness and the pain. Or, sometimes there is the opportunity to take a rest and appreciate the view.

Two questions I have been asking myself lately are:

  1. Is there time to walk?
  2. What is my perspective of the mountain?

The Hidden Power of the Gospels: Four Questions, Four Paths, One Journey

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An Excerpt from The Hidden Power of the Gospels: Four Questions, Four Paths, One Journey by Alexander J. Shaia with Michelle Gaugy

 

“The wisdom teachings in Matthew contain such an abundance of sensible counsel that we would do well to keep them close. They are a poetic guide to the promises and the dangers that greet us on the first path. The recommendations and responses they hold are truly Be-Attitudes designed to move us forward. They challenge us to:

• “Accept that we do not and will not know results in advance. We often feel ‘poor in spirit.’

• “Make farewells to our yesterdays and embrace the grief we feel.

• “Be humble in our willingness to journey. Yielding to exile will yield riches of Spirit.

• “Know that our true hunger and thirst are for Spirit, and only Spirit, despite all trials and temptations.

• “Greet all we encounter, within and without, in mercy, and reap the rewards of gratitude. Recognize that mercy derives from merces, a Latin word that translates as ‘reward.’ (It continued into French as merci, meaning ‘thanks,’ or ‘gratitude.’)

• “Be full of heart. Do not seek to remove any thought, any feeling, or any person from our inner life. Each is an aspect of Spirit. Welcome them all.

• “Believe in ‘Jeru-Shalom’ as a home of welcome that accommodates the true peace of respect for differing voices, if we will but listen.

• “Accept inner and outer hardship as needed for the sake of living a new life in the presence of God. Power and applause are not what we seek. Our journey leads instead to humility and service.

• “Anticipate lack of esteem. Be prepared instead for conflict — and meet it with respect and love.

“The nine Beatitudes reflect diverse parts of a harmonious unity which I endlessly reflect and touch each other as we go through our lives. At the very heart of Jesus’s teachings, their practice opens us to compassion. If we are able to place these on our hearts, walk with them on our feet, hold them in our hands, and seal them in our thoughts, we will have more insight along our journey. They will become our walking staff and guide for the arduous times we will face.

“We can certainly find equal relevance in the rest of the Sermon on the Mount. All of us have ‘heard it said’ — by parents, by friends, by society, by religious institutions — that we ought to ‘do this’ or ‘avoid that.’ Unreflectively, we may have accepted or rejected what we have heard. Jesus’s words ask us to become more conscious. He tells us that truth is not found on the surface. We are encouraged to explore the original purpose and meanings of the things we have been told, as well as their genuine truth and relevance in our hearts and lives today.

“We have talked about the risk of returning to older, seemingly simpler ways, but an equal peril lurks within this first path: the urge to rush in the opposite direction. Our ego-mind can just as readily deceive us into thinking that all of yesterday’s wisdom is empty folly — that nothing we have ever learned or been told has merit or benefit; that we are without guidance. Rejecting everything and racing off to the ‘new and better’ can be a sprint to isolation and despair. Either one of these extreme positions is only a trick, not a truth. Quadratos requires that we ignore these deceptions and dig deeper, explore further. Although many people and institutions have become protectors of empty practices, there are others who still hold truthful, living attitudes of heart. We are on a journey to discover which have real veracity for us and endeavor to claim them in our own personal way.”

Everything will be ok!!!

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“Breathe. You’re going to be okay. Breathe and remember that you’ve been in this place before. You’ve been this uncomfortable and anxious and scared, and you’ve survived. Breathe and know that you can survive this too. These feelings can’t break you. They’re painful and debilitating, but you can sit with them and eventually, they will pass. Maybe not immediately, but sometime soon, they are going to fade and when they do, you’ll look back at this moment and laugh for having doubted your resilience. I know it feels unbearable right now, but keep breathing, again and again. This will pass. I promise it will pass.”
—Daniell Koepke

Leadership in Liminal Times

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I just read this article in the Harvard Business Review. There is much for me to ponder on:

Leaders have always shown their mettle in times of liminality. The term comes from Arnold van Gennep, the Belgian anthropologist who first outlined the common patterns in how cultures mark transitions from one human state to another (for example, from adolescence to adulthood). In his 1909 book The Rites of Passage he described three stages of separation from one world and entry into another. The liminal (or threshold) stage is central. Commenting later on van Gennep’s work, anthropologist Victor Turner explained it as “a moment when those being moved in accordance with a cultural script were liberated from normative demands, when they were, indeed, betwixt and between successive lodgments in jural political systems. In this gap between ordered worlds almost anything may happen.”

Organizations must also periodically go through such wrenching times of transition, and it is during such liminal times that leaders have their greatest impact. They must manage to both craft the new world with smart strategy, often in the wake of disruption, and cause the organization to embrace the required change. Lou Gerstner’s arrival at IBM in 1993 is a classic example of leadership through a liminal period. Parachuted in to salvage a beleaguered organization, he pushed the company toward a new way of thinking, ultimately growing IBM’s value and revenues by more than 40 percent.

Another key passage is this:

Times of liminality are disconcertingly chaotic; therefore, a leader’s job is to provide some firm footing for people, with assurances of what will not keep changing. Gerstner did this with his clear and consistent view of where IBM needed to go, and Lafley did it with his reassertion of bedrock values. Great leaders also act as mentors, providing counsel and coaching to the people in the organization during various stages of transition. And perhaps the ultimate work of leaders in times of organizational change is to ensure high engagement levels.

I few months ago at the end of a retreat I was told that I was in a liminal space. I have wondered what this means in my own leadership? Much of what I thought I would be leading in no longer there. But, while I continue to breathe it’s not over yet.

Like what Seth Godin says to do:

Make two lists. One that lists all your obstacles:

The defects in your family situation, the criticisms your work has received lately. It is a list of people who have better luck than you and moments you’ve been shafted and misunderstood.

Then the other is the good stuff:

The lucky breaks, the advantages, the good feedback, your trusted network. It talks about the accident of being born in the right time and the right place, your health, your freedom. It features your education, your connection to the marketplace and just about every nice thing someone has said about you in the last week or month.

Which one do you choose to read?

 

http://blogs.hbr.org/2014/10/leadership-in-liminal-times/

Happening upon happiness

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I discovered a strange thing over the past weekend.

Happiness is about spending time with people. Valuing them. Listening to the person. Not judging.

This is my wife’s perspective on the weekend we spent away.

“Chris told me he was taking me away for a ‘romantic weekend’. Our room with a queen size bed. Restaurant that serves pre- dinner drinks & nibblies. Ensuites that is a mere 200 metres from our queen bed. And a view to die for once you walk 2.4 km directly uphill. (Romantic weekend conjured up a different image in my head.)”

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We spent hours walking together. Talking. Listening. Sometimes not saying anything. There were no shops.

It was a happy time.

Do one thing at a time

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Peter Drucker once said the number-one trait of an effective leader is that they do one thing at a time. Today’s technology tools give you great opportunities to do 73 things at a time or to at least delude yourself that you are. I see managers who look like 12-year-olds with attention deficit disorder, running around from one thing to the next, constantly barraged with information, constantly chasing the next shiny thing.

The Secret to Success

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Leadership the Hard Way, by Dov Frohman. The two things that are crucial to success are firstly, that 50 percent of your time should be unscheduled. And second—and I love that this is coming from an Israeli intelligence guy—that the secret to success is daydreaming.

Leadership is about people

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If you’re a leader, your whole reason for living is to help human beings develop—to really develop people and make work a place that’s energetic and exciting and a growth opportunity, whether you’re running a Housekeeping Department or Google. I mean, this is not rocket science.

It’s not even a shadow of rocket science. You’re in the people-development business. If you take a leadership job, you do people. Period. It’s what you do. It’s what you’re paid to do. People, period. Should you have a great strategy? Yes, you should. How do you get a great strategy? By finding the world’s greatest strategist, not by being the world’s greatest strategist. You do people. Not my fault. You chose it. And if you don’t get off on it, do the world a favor and get the hell out before dawn, preferably without a gilded parachute. But if you want the gilded parachute, it’s worth it to get rid of you.

Tom Peters

Am I happy or unhappy

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I find it sad that we live in a world where right and wrong is determined by whether we are happy. By doing this a person is making the ultimate selfish comment. “I am happy when things work out my way” The insinuation is that I must be right if I feel happy. I am unhappy when things are not working out my way. Something must be wrong if this is occurring. I will either blame other people or God for this problem. Either response reflects the immaturity of childishness by demonstrating determining our place in the world on the basis of how the world is responding to me. Personal desire is the benchmark for right and wrong.

It has struck me recently that when dealing with conflict in my workplace that some people have never progressed simple childish responses. And ultimately if the decisions that I make don’t make them happy then I am wrong.

I hope that my children are able to grow beyond this. I don’t want to raise emotional infants. I hope that my children are able to see the world through other people’s eyes as well as their own. So that they don’t live in the illusion that simply because they are happy that everything else is alright.

How great men spend organised their time

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In this post at LifeDev less is more is definitely true.

The way that great men organised their time is a reminder to all of us that busyness is not always the answer. I think that part of it is about using our most productive times productively.

I know that for myself productiveness also comes in cycles beyond the daily routine. I might have a week where I am incredibly productive and then have another week where I just get the everyday stuff done.

I think one of the hardest things to recognise that after a cycle of productivity comes the routine of making the creation work. Thats hard work and requires perserverance.

Freelance Switch

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I have enjoyed many of the articles that have been written by Freelance Switch. Even though they are only 6 months old they have build an impressive following.

I especially liked this tool the hourly rate calculator.

Finding yourself is about finding others

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I think that one of the major weaknesses of society is the emphasis on me.

  1. We are told to look after number one.
  2. We are told that the most important person is me
  3. We are told that you have to look after yourself first
  4. We are told that the most important discovery that we will make is about ourselves.

Of course there are elements of truth in all of the above list. We do need to have a certain level of self care. We cannot ignore some of our basic needs. But any system of self help must include the question how do I find my place among others.

Humans are social beings. We live in societies, we work in teams, we have families, we join groups. These are all important parts of being human. We cannot find ourselves until we are able to deal with the realities of living in a community.

One of the fundamental weaknesses of democracy is its insistence on the rights of the individual. This is because to a large extent we have failed to discover a common set of values that can bind us together as a community. We see the effects of the breakdown in community all around us. Broken families, depression, anxiety, stress, physical distress are all evidence of a breakdown in our wellbeing.
But the real outcome of this is that people become lost. When we no longer are able to function in community or find a community that we can function in and so we lose our way.

I have worked with people for a long time and over and over the story I hear is one of people trying to discover their place in the world. They ask the question, from where do I get meaning? And as much as self help can be an aid in that journey its not the destination.

Any journey of self discovery must take you to a place where you are able to meet with others. A place where people know your name, where you are valued because of who you are and not what you produce, where you begin to see yourself clearly through the eyes of others. It is only when we begin to realise the impact that we have on others that we can begin to change. If we only ever look at ourselves we will lack the impetus to make life altering changes in our own lives.

Success – attitude that will make it

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I think a lot of this is really common sense but sometimes we need to be reminded about the sorts of attitudes that lead to a successful life. At any point on this diagram we can short circuit success.

“No one ever finds life worth living he has to make it worth living.”
Unknown

“Pity is one of the noblest emotions available to human beings; self-pity is possibly the most ignoble . . . . [It] is an incapacity, a crippling emotional disease that severely distorts our perception of reality . . . a narcotic that leaves its addicts wasted and derelict.”
Eugene H. Peterson
Author of Earth and Altar

“The winner’s edge is not in a gifted birth, a high IQ, or in talent. The winner’s edge is all in the attitude, not aptitude. Attitude is the criterion for success.”
Dennis Waitley

success.jpg

General Colin Powell’s Rules:

1. It ain’t as bad as you think. It will look better in the morning.
2. Get mad, then get over it.
3. Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your
position falls, your ego goes with it.
4. It can be done!
5. Be careful what you choose. You may get it.
6. Don’t let adverse facts stand in the way of a good decision.
7. You can’t make someone else’s choices. You shouldn’t let someone
else make yours.
8. Check small things.
9. Share credit.
10. Remain calm. Be kind.
11. Have a vision. Be demanding.
12. Don’t take counsel of your fears or naysayers.
13. Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier.

Vision – Creating a picture for the future

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“I have a dream” Martin Luther King

I once asked the founder of the organization in which I worked how he defined vision. He told me it is something that continually eats away at you until you have to make it happen.

When he became a Christian there was no support for young people who needed to be discipled. This lack gnawed away at him until he finally collaborated with a farmer in western New South Wales to create a small community in which young people could study, be mentored, reflect and work to contribute to their board and tuition. Out of this idea has developed an organization in which hundreds of young people have been discipled and gone onto greater Christian service.

Vision is more than just coming up with a good idea. Most of us have plenty of these. It is about enduring the hardships of the journey and to encourage and take others on that journey as well. From both the animal and human studies, we know there are critical developmental windows in the first years of life. Sensory and motor skills are formed, and if this early opportunity is lost, trying to play catch up is hugely frustrating and mostly unsuccessful.

Prof. Zajoc writes of studies which investigated recovery from congenital blindness. Thanks to cornea transplants, people who had been blind from birth would suddenly have functional use of their eyes. Nevertheless, success was rare. Referring to one young boy, the world does not appear to the patient as filled with the gifts of intelligible light, color, and shape upon awakening from surgery,Zajoc observes. Light and eyes were not enough to grant the patient sight. The light of day beckoned, but no light of mind replied within the boy’s anxious, open eyes.

Zajoc quotes from a study by a Dr. Moreau who observed that while surgery gave the patient the power to see,the employment of this power, which as a whole constitutes the act of seeing, still has to be acquired from the beginning. Dr. Moreau concludes, To give back sight to a congenitally blind person is more the work of an educator than of a surgeon.To which Zajoc adds, The sober truth remains that vision requires far more than a functioning physical organ. Without an inner light, without a formative visual imagination, we are blind, he explains. That inner light the light of the mind must flow into and marry with the light of nature to bring forth a world. (National Right to Life News, March 30, 1993, p. 22)

Martin Luther King’s statement I have a dream,saw a better world. But he also shared with people the pain of the journey to that dream. Even though the American constitution declared the liberty and freedom of all people this was not a reality in the American south. Martin Luther King paid for his vision with his life but his shared journey with other African Americans allowed for significant progress to be made in the breaking down of racist barriers.

Warren Bennis said this after his study of organisations,

In every case where they had reached epiphanies, there was a leader who was able to enrol people in an exciting, insanely significant vision. Someone who was capable of reeling in the advocates and supporters to work with him or her. They all believed that they could make a dent in the universe.(1997)

The signs of an effective organisational vision for this learning context will be evident in its followers. Secondly the question must be asked at all levels are people learning? It will be the leadership vision and effective management of the vision that will enable your organization to achieve new goals.

Bennis (1997) also states what leaders must create is the social architecture that encourages people to work together successfully. The difficulty facing leadership is to harness egos to unleash the potential that is available. For an organisation such as the church the social structure must extent beyond superficial social niceties and be channelled into the practical aspects of fulfilling its vision. The social architecture will be constructed through its reorganisation as a learning organisation in which each of its participants becomes a contributing learner.

In such a structure the leadership and the members are repositioned. The leaders are not permitted any pedestals and the learners are asked to step up to their responsibilities. The outcome will be a group of people with a shared philosophy who are able to work together to achieve effective outcomes.

John Maxwell suggests some of the following ideas if an environment is to be created that will encourage others to take hold of a vision:

  • Come alongside them There are different levels of leadership that a leader can have. At the bottom level is designated authority. This is where people follow because of your assigned position and they have no choice. At the highest level is that of personhood/respect. At this level you have developed followers who are loyal and sacrificial. They are this way because they have seen you demonstrate sacrificial and loyal leadership to them.
  • Paint a picture for them. This picture should set new horizons for the individuals in the organisation; it should give hope; it should be challenging; it should provide freedom; the journey is important; it should provide a path to the ultimate goal; they should be able to see your total commitment to the vision. (Maxwell,J)
  • Put it into context . Shaller says that the most effective leaders are those that understand and adopt the values of the group that they join.
  • There is a big difference between one’s personal vision and implementing a corporate vision. A personal vision will not change an organization and belongs to the leader alone. A leader must be able to rise above themselves and to see the future through other people’s perspective.

A gift of love from the heart

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One of the most profound words of wisdom that I ever heard regarding self development was that the first step was to get out and help someone else. This insight helped me to identify that the key to fulfillment and happiness was to discover a higher purpose than our own needs and desires.

Steve Pavlina describes this in a recent post when he says, But when I focus on serving others, it’s like I’m plugging into a much more powerful battery. Energy flows through me instead of from me.

This is very true. I remember that April and I were given such a gift when on our honeymoon. We were eating our lunch in a busy shopping centre. There were no other tables left but we had a spare chair at our table. There was a well dressed lady with a plate of food who was obviously looking for somewhere to sit. We invited her to sit at our table.

During the course of our meal we chatted with her. We had very little money at that stage of our life and but were very happy with our purpose. This lady had lots of money but described a life that was full of unhappiness. When we finished we went our separate ways.

April and I got onto a train to go to our next destination. A couple of stops further along the lady that we shared lunch with go onto the train. She recognised April and I and sat with us. She got up to leave at the next stop but as she did she handed us a large sum of money. It was enough to allow us to be able to enjoy some nice things on our honeymoon.

This demonstrated the power of being able to share our hearts with someone else. We may not always receive a financial reward but there will always be a positive benefit when share in this way. We received from this lady a gift of love and all it required was for her to experience our heart response to her situation

Thanks Steve for reminding me of that special moment in our lives. The post is spot on and a reminder that although most of the world will tell us that the most important person in the world is me that this is not the whole truth. Sure we have to care for ourselves but we must never forget that we are social beings designed to contribute to the greater good of all of us.

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